also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Randomize
