if you like me you must not know who I am
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
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