I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
