I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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