you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
