Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
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