Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
