afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
