If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
