The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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