***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
