how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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