You really coming over, don't trick.
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Church boner. Awkwardddd
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
