It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
