Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Randomize