I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
