what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
