Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
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