can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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