I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
