Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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