No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I came so hard my ears popped.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
