And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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