me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
