It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize