do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
