Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Randomize
