We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize