there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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