He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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