Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize