what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
