So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I want her autograph on my taint
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
