On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
