I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Randomize
