dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
