Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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