You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Randomize