Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize