So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize