Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
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