i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize