dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
