it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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