it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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