K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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