I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
God I need to hump something, right now.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
