It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize