My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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