I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Randomize