I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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