I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
